Welcoming Katya

The new blog is up!  Check it out!

http://www.welcomingkatya.com/

Thanks, Daniel, for doing a great job!

Apparently comments are no longer being allowed because of the monthly limit exceeded thing.  But, the good news is that I will be posting the link to a NEW BLOG next week that has no limits.  That sounds impressive, doesn’t it!

Thanks for all your prayers and comments through the day.  No real updates, but God’s giving me peace. 

 

We’ve hit a glitch, a bump, or a derailment, I can’t tell which, and we would love your prayer.  Some of you understand the Ukrainian adoption world, or the adoption world in general and may not need all the specifics.  I’m going to try and make this as simple as I can, knowing that I don’t fully understand the process.
 

Background:

1.       There are two types of orphans in Ukraine – social orphans and pure orphans.  Social orphans are kids who would most likely be placed in foster care in the U.S.  They still have family that is somewhat involved in their lives and they are not available for adoption.  Katya was placed in the orphanage when she was 6 as a social orphan, but was registered as a pure orphan on March 4, 2008.  She was almost 7 at this point.

2.       Once the children are registered as pure orphans, they must be in the system for 14 months before they are available for international adoption.  This allows Ukrainians to come forward and adopt Ukrainian children, for family members to appear, etc.  Katya’s 14 months will be completed in May, 2009 and therefore she should be available for us to adopt her after May.

3.       Katya  has a grandmother, Tamara, who cared for her until she placed her in the orphanage.  This is not news to us.  We have always known about Tamara.  Our understanding has been that Tamara placed her in the orphanage knowing that she was unable to meet Katya’s needs and that Katya’s chances at adoption decrease as she gets older.  We have also understood that Tamara had relinquished all guardian rights.  We have prayed for Tamara as well as Katya and believe that this is a piece of our call to care for both orphans and widows.

 

Current Situation:

1.       We have heard from Dima, our facilitator, that although Katya was registered on March 4, 2008, Tamara still needs to write a letter refusing to be her guardian.  He assures us that this is not a problem as she wants Katya to be adopted by us.  We have also heard anecdotally from Vinny at Frontier Horizon that Tamara does want us, specifically, to adopt Katya.  This is important to us, because we have no desire to remove Katya from her grandmother if her grandmother does not desire that she be adopted. 

2.       We don’t know how this letter of refusal to be Katya’s guardian impacts the timing.  It could be that it doesn’t affect the timing at all and it’s just something to check off the list.  OR it could mean that once the letter is written, the 14-month wait starts back over.  OR it could mean that if she doesn’t write the letter, that Katya will never be available for adoption.

3.       Vinny, of Frontier Horizon, is in Ukraine right now and will hopefully be able to meet with Nina, the orphanage director and Tamara to sort through this situation.  Dima, our facilitator, is also working on this.

 

So, please pray:

1.       God will give us peace and prayers as we watch and wait.

2.       God will give Vinny clarity and favor to find answers quickly.

3.       God will guide Dima’s footsteps as he works on our behalf.

4.       God will care for Katya’s heart as she has heard of our intent and has asked us to come get her “tomorrow.”

5.       God will care for Tamara as she makes a very difficult decision. 

 

Our confidence is two-fold:

1.       God is good - He knows what is best for Katya and for us

2.       God is great – He is powerful to orchestrate events according to His ultimate plan

 

Thank you for being friends who care for us and will pray for us.  I will keep you updated.

“Not today.”

“Then tomorrow.”

So went our conversation with Katya this morning with Liliya interpreting.  Bittersweet and beautiful, increasing our urgency even more while we wait. 

A word of encouragement came to me from Molly, one of my college girls -

“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.  He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken.  On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God.”  Psalm 62:5-7

As I was urged by Molly, so shall I choose to wait for God alone - not for word of a completed home study, word from the U.S. government, word from Dima that all the Ukrainian red tape is in place, but for God alone.  I will hide  myself in Him and work on the dossier, on history planning, on writing our family devotional for the week …  And as I work I will worship in silence, in song, and in the secular made sacred.

Yes, Katya, we are working to come to you and bring you home.  Be strong, Little One.  You might not understand now, but we are not your rock or your salvation.  We are simply acting as the hands and feet of the ONE who is. 

My Father, my Papa, my Abba, come to me today.  I need you.  I need you. 

Thanks to the generosity of a dear brother, “Welcoming Katya” will be up and running again, in its entirety on February 3.  There will be no more monthly limits, so I can post as many pictures as I want and you can pass on the link to as many of your friends as you want.  :)

Tomorrow we’ll be skyping with Katya!  She has an English lesson with Liliya at 2:00 PM Ukraine time and then we’ll talk after that (3:15 PM - Ukraine time, 8:15 AM - our time).  This will be the first real communication we’ve had with her since she was with us this summer.  I’m excited, but a little nervous.  I have no idea what folks have told her about our intentions, but there are plenty of people around her who know that we’re trying to adopt her so it’s likely that she is aware of this too.  Pray that Bill and I will have wisdom in how we communicate with her - whether it would be hope-producing for her to hear from us our work to bring her home, or whether it is just too soon.  My fear is that the adoption would fall through and she would have to walk through disappointment and a sense of abandonment again. 

But deeper than my fear, is my confidence that perfect LOVE casts out fear.  So, Jesus, since You alone are perfect love, remove my fear and enable me to walk in Your wisdom as I talk with Katya tomorrow.     

A link to a new site will be coming soon!

We’re figuring this out and trying to decide whether to upgrade to a new plan so that our monthly transfer limit can accomomdate the traffic.  Any tips from those who have faced the same thing?  I’m thrilled for all the folks stopping by!  I’ll keep you posted!

Look at this cutie.  God gave me a “heads-up” when Bill said to me, “Can we take her home?”  She lives in an orphanage in the Rivne District of Ukraine, but unlike Katya, she is not a “pure orphan,” she’s a “social orphan.”  This means that there is still family somewhere in her picture.  This could be good, or not so good, depending on how involved that family is.  For some of these “social orphans,” it would be a blessing to be moved to “pure orphan” status so they are available to become part of a family.

While at the orphanage we toured spotless bedrooms …

Chlorine scented bathrooms …

And the youngest children’s classroom.  Our group brought over 11 blankets to give out at the orphanage.  How in the world would we choose who would receive these blankets?  Listen to this “coincidence.”  In this classroom of 23 children, 11 were ”pure orphans.”  So, I was able to talk with these children (with Svetlana’s help) and explain to them that women and children in America had made these blankets and prayed for the children who would receive them. Rather than simply give them a blanket, we had them choose their own - one by one.  I was amazed.  Unlike what I would expect in America, even in my own family, there was no jockeying for who would get to go first.  This little boy did let us know that if possible could he please have the one with the lion.  Of course I set this one aside for him.

 

This little girl in the front didn’t stop smiling.  You can tell that she’s been at the orphanage for awhile because her hair is long.  It is standard procedue in many of the orphanages to shave the children’s heads when they first come in. 

While Katya was with us this summer, one day I went up to the attic and found that we had made not 11 blankets but 12!  In God’s providence He had provided the perfect number of blankets for the orphans in this Rivne orphanage and for Katya to take home with her.  And the one that I found in the attic was one the I and the Finley kids had made. 

Seeds were planted that day in Ukraine when my heart broke as I pondered the reality of over 200 children living in an institution.  These seeds were watered as that little cutie climbed into Bill’s lap.  God had been preparing  the soil of our hearts long before we set foot on the soil of Ukraine and He alone is responsible for the sprouting of this seed. 

“I planted, Apollos watered, but God gives the growth.  So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth.”  1 Corinthians 3:6-7

 

As Bill and I are checking off our lists, it’s good to remember that we are doing much more than paperwork.  We are strategically engaged to bring Katya home.  The following post is by a young lady - Rhya who was adopted by Clark and Kris Stoesz when she was 10.  There organization, Ukraine Orphan Outreach is listed in the sidebar. People may say, “What can be so bad about an orphanage?  They have food.  They have shelter.  They have school.”  But what they don’t have is a family.  God sets the lonely in families (Psalm 68:6), not institutions.

A Day in the Life of an Orphan by Rhya Stoesz (age 12)

Hi my name is Rhya Stoesz and I am Clarke and Kris’s daughter. I was adopted 2.5 years ago by the “Stoesz” family and I am happy to be here. I wanted to tell you a little about my time at the “internat” which is where I lived and went to school for 2.5 years with my brother Luke. When you wake up, do you usually have a nice breakfast or a hot cup of coffee? If you were at my orphanage in Zhytomir the first thing you have to do when you wake up is get down on your hands and knees and scrub the floors. The floors there are filthy and smelly. Sometimes I wished to not do such awful jobs, but I knew that hard work pays off. Since there are a lot of kids at the orphanage you would have to eat fast so other kids could eat too. For breakfast I hardly ate because the food was not tasty. We would have fish (which you would have to clean out the bones) and porridge for breakfast. After we ate we had to get dressed into our uniforms for school. After we got ready everybody gets to class as a group. You had to hold hands with boys, which was not my favorite part. At our class we had to do reading, writing, math and gym class. I worked hard and tried my best. We would spend the day studying and end our day with dinner consisting of bread, porridge and a hard boiled egg. We did not have clothes that belonged to us so at bed time we had to even share our pajamas. While lying in my bed at night, I loved to think about how it would be a miracle if I had a family. I would dream about having a family and it was such a happy moment until I would wake up. I prayed to God about having a family. I thought it would never happen. Many times I felt lonely in the strange dark world. I used to think that I would be stuck in the orphanage until the director would say that I am old enough to take care of myself. The day that my dream came true I was very happy. Today I know that dreams do come true and just have faith in God. I often think about the children left back in Ukraine living in orphanages. They dream for a warmer place, food, nice clothes and most importantly a family they can call their own. The older they get the less chance they have of getting adopted. The children don’t know what is good or what is wrong. They need a mom and dad to lead and help support their life. I wonder if they are OK and I know that they are waiting for someone to reach out to them and love them. They certainly wish for a better life and future.

The Fronteir Horizon crew all arrived safely back in Ukraine.  The hand-off from Ira to Dima happened and he is in now in possession of our “Power of Attorney.”  Monday or Tuesday he will turn in our papers to the SDA in Kiev and within a couple of weeks we will find out the definitive status of Katya’s availability.   I imagine this will be a long two weeks as we wait to hear.  Please pray with us that the paperwork is in order and Katya actually was registered in March 2008.